The Kindness of Strangers

Our little family likes to go out and eat Mexican food. There are some complications to dining out with small children, but we have a system. 1) DEE-structor gets to bring his toy of choice. Sometimes, this is a veritable flood of toys as what qualifies around our house as "one toy" actually equals "one toy tote." (DEE's favorite is a purple Halloween pumpkin that he uses to carry his trains. The pumpkin was his very own innovation.)

Smiley has his very own seat and table mat. The table mat is one of those nifty anti-germ things, but we use the mat more as an indication of Smiley's reach. I gave birth to another 'Stretch Armstrong'. He is content as long as he can have Goldfish. He may turn yellow/orange as he is now eating Goldfish at breakfast, lunch, second lunch, snack and dinner. He may be part Hobbitt. Hmmm, Stretch Armstrong + Hobbitt. Hmmmmmm.

I digress. DEE loves chips and salsa. For the most part, he eats and plays and is really pretty well behaved. Or as well behaved as a wiggly five-year-old can get. This particular evening, DEE is indulging in some serious "stemming" behavior. DEE likes to squeeze his hands together under his chin and make a rapid, somewhat loud "EEEEEEEEE" noise. And, we're not sitting in a booth, oh no, we're right out in the middle of the restaurant and I can just feel the other customers staring at my little boy. No one approaches us and nothing is said but I am just sure that every single person in there is thinking about us and our weird little boy.

The following evening I am sitting at a local nail salon having my fingers salvaged from their latest set of gel-acrylic nails. A lady comes from the pedicure chairs (aren't those massage chairs just heaven?) and sits down next to me. She smiles for a moment and says, "Weren't you at "Favorite Mexican Resurant" last night?"

I cringed inwardly, thinking of all the "stemming" DEE had done and here it comes I thought. "Yes" I told her. "I think you were sitting in the booths behind us. I'm sorry if DEE disturbed you. He is autistic and was having a bad night."

She smiled at me. And proceeded to tell me how well behaved both the boys were, and not only did DEE not bother her, she didn't hear him making any noises and certainly didn't notice that he was autistic.

Knock me over with a feather. We had a wonderful conversation about the signs of autism and the programs available in our area for our kiddos. She had some concerns about a grandchild of hers. And I was left with this gift: I got to see my son without a label. As just a kid. And remember, how truly blessed I am for having such a wonderful son. Thank you, Complete and Total Stranger. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!